We interrupt the following program to bring you a special bulletin. The Holy Roller Emperor Penguin God has apparently been in an unfortunate accident, and has in essence, had an ecclesiastical epiphany of some type...let's listen in now on World Wide iNi TV as he shares his unusual quandry with the American Nayshun...

"....my near death experience last night...a 727 crashed through the roof of the house and I was rushed to hospital with ninety four percent of my body burned to a crisp...but because I'm holy they were able to regenerate my entire body from the DNA in my last breath...

When I woke up a few hours later I noticed I was naked AND A LOT OF PEOPLE IN THE LAB WERE LOOKING AT ME...IN FACT THEY WERE FILMING ME ...THEY NEVER SAW JESUS CHRIST BEFORE...AND NAKED..."

Hello Hello, this is the announcer speaking, we seem to have lost the audio and video here. Did he say LAB? WHAT? What the HELL do you MEAN he is GONE? HE WAS JUST THERE ON CAMERA! WHERE THE HELL IS THE DIRECTOR? WHAT? WHAT DO YOU MEAN THE DIRECTOR IS GONE TOO? WHAT? RAPTURE? WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN "IT LOOKS LIKE THE RAPTURE HAS HAPPENED?"

Folks I do not understand what is happening in the studio live but we now return you to the regular iNi TV programming until the Holy Roller Emperor Penguin God who is apparently now Jesus Christ can be found.

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